Period One, below the original post you will find the fixes you submitted. Look at them; critique them. Are they better? Do they address the problems in the original post? Do they create new ones? Take a look.
Original Post–Problematic Section:
Upon further research, the Toxic Cosmetics Ingredients List claims that Bronopol “causes allergic contact dermatitis.” “Allergic contact dermatitis is caused by a reaction to substances called allergens that come into contact with your skin” a quote from the American Academy of Dermatology.
Fix 1 Upon further research, the Toxic Cosmetics Ingredients List claims that Bronopol “causes allergic contact dermatitis.” “Allergic contact dermatitis is caused by a reaction to substances called allergens that come into contact with your skin,” states the American Academy of Dermatology.
Fix 2 Upon further research, the Toxic Cosmetics Ingredients List claims that Bronopol “causes allergic contact dermatitis.” The American Academy of Dermatology quotes, “Allergic contact dermatitis is caused by a reaction to substances called allergens that come into contact with your skin.”
Fix 3 Upon further research, the Toxic Cosmetics Ingredients List claims that Bronopol “causes allergic contact dermatitis.” The American Academy of Dermatology says, “Allergic contact dermatitis is caused by a reaction to substances called allergens that come into contact with your skin.”
Fix 4 Upon further research, the Toxic Cosmetics Ingredients List claims that Bronopol, “causes allergic contact dermatitis.” According to the American Academy of Dermatology, “Allergic contact dermatitis is caused by a reaction to substances called allergens that come into contact with your skin” a quote from the American Academy of Dermatology.
Fix 5 Upon further research, the Toxic Cosmetics Ingredients List claims that Bronopol “causes allergic contact dermatitis.” The American Academy of Dermatology tell us what causes allergic reactions: “Allergic contact dermatitis is caused by a reaction to substances called allergens that come into contact with your skin.”
Fix 6 Upon further research, the Toxic Cosmetics Ingredients List claims that Bronopol “causes allergic contact dermatitis.” A quote from the American Academy of Dermatology states that, “Allergic contact dermatitis is caused by a reaction to substances called allergens that come into contact with your skin.”
Fix 7 Upon further research, the Toxic Cosmetics Ingredients List claims that Bronopol “causes allergic contact dermatitis.” A quote from the American Acadamy of Dermatology also defines that “Allergic contact dermatitis is caused by a reaction to substances called allergens that come into contact with your skin.”
THE BEST FIXES:
1. Upon further research, the Toxic Cosmetics Ingredients list claims that Bronopol “causes allergic contact dermatitis,” a reaction to allergens that come in contact with the skin, according to the American Academy of Dermatology.
2. Upon further research, the Toxic Cosmetics Ingredients List claims that Bronopol “causes allergic contact dermatitis.” which, according to the American Academy of Dermatology, is a “reaction to substances called allergens that come into contact with your skin.”